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Rescuer

A person operating from a "Rescuer View of Reality" lives as if all of life were a continual drama where "good guys" need rescued from "bad guys" or "bad situations." The person behaving as a "Rescuer" operates as if he or she were responsible for others' situations.

The Rescuer lives as if his or her own needs and wants are of little importance, while common Rescuer expressions suggest something very different: "Is this the thanks I get?"; "After all I have done for you."; "Fine! Then don't say I didn't try!" Sometimes these expressions take the form of silent marterdom thoughts. (Notice the simultaneous Victim and Persecutor nature of such language on the part of the Rescuer.)

The Rescuer's way of participating in relationships is to attempt to "fix" others' living situations while actually promoting dependency upon the Rescuer to keep "helping" the Victim (outside of the Rescuer's and the Victim's conscious awareness). When operating from the Rescuer position the person is continuiously finding Persecutors to battle while "saving" the assumed Victims.

Having had childhood experiences where his or her own needs were likely neglected, the person operating as a Rescuer struggles to get those needs met "once removed" through "helping" others with "short-term repairs". Those on the receiving end of the Rescuer's (often unsolicited) "help" would be better served by their acknowledging ownership of their own situations thereby learning and growing through their own failures and successes.

People who genuinely offer assistance to others do so free of expectations and free of fostering others' dependency upon them. A genuine helper encourages self-responsibility and demonstrates clear and drama-free communication and actions.

Of course sometimes events and persons create genuine victims whose lives thankfully are saved through the heroic and disciplined rescuing efforts of others who care, e.g., Coast Guard, Fire, and Police, etc., as well as passers-by-in-life offering "good samaritan" care.

Rescuerers in VRP drama triangles simultaneously Persecute others, making new Victims (the original so-called Persecutors).

Stephen B. Karpman, M.D. was the first to identify the "Drama Triangle": Karpman, S. (1968). Fairy tales and script drama analysis. Transactional Analysis Bulletin, 7(26), 39-43.

VRP: I have to help, because her selfish husband will not. more Green: I am concerned. Her husband said that he needs the car during the day. more

VRP: Do not talk to the kids that way! more Green: When I heard you call her "stupid" I felt frustrated and angry. more

VRP: Don't be sad or angry; she is with the angels. more Green: I am sad, and I see you crying. For myself, I am trusting that she is with the angels. more


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Team Edserve Inc. Pleasanton, CA, John Tompkins, Psychotherapist, MFT #7323
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